LoL. It happened! Like I was ostracised for the past 5 months (or more), and then now I was singled out and asked "What is my problem?" or more like "Sit. (woof! *pant pant*) I demand to know what is your problem. (ooohh...scared...)"
When that question was thrown at me, I was actually silent for a few seconds (or maybe a full minute) because MY FIRST THOUGHTS was "My problem? Which one?"
Do I tell about
1) Last year when you forced me to take car license with my own god-damn money but in the end when I finally cleared it you did not allow me to use the car (more like only use it with people are inside, and with all the complains). Shit, I could have gotten my bike license sia instead of the car which I seldom get to use. Even when I want to rent, someone called the rental company and ask the boss to come up with some "new drivers not allowed" crap (but a person with no license can) so that I do not get to rent the car (albeit with my own moolars).
Or do I tell about
2) From when I was 21 (until now) and still my passport is being locked and I am prohibited to go out to venture the world (reason being I do not have any savings, it's a waste of time, it's a waste of money). Shit, if permission and freedom to travel was given, I would have saved my money because I know that I can look forward to go out on an adventure in the future sia instead of saving and being stuck here in Singapore. Damnit, I cannot even go across the border lah sia. Oh wait. that is not politically correct. If a quidnunc were to call and report this post it would be inaccurate. I can go over the border to Malaysia (only) but with MUCH RESISTANCE. Very much.
Or do I tell about
3)When I was 18 (until now, like how old am I) and still I have not been given that full freedom of going for chalets, campings, overnights, clubbing (haha. FAT HOPE), with my friends even though it is only in Singapore (reason being it's a waste of time). Shit, it's always a waste of time, isn't it? Like as though humans always make full use of their time. Oh. By the way, it's called RELAXING and having FUN. But of course, I cannot but those two with a gun sticking out front down south can (sometimes I wish I could go for a sex change just to add something sticking down south so I could have more freedom). Fair. VERY FAIR. "I'm always fair with my heir" Right...
Wait. Or do I tell about
4) When I was 16 and not given the freedom to go out with my friends to movies, walk around town, explore Singapore. Shit, whoever gives curfews at 7 p.m. anymore at age 16? Reasonable. Very reasonable. "I'm always reasonable. I do things with reasons" Right... more like Selfish reasons. But then I am smarter. I extended my own time and now I just need to be home. I don't care about the scoldings and naggings of coming home late the moment I was locked out of the house that one day.
Oh ya. Or do I tell about
5) From I was 10 (until now) how whenever something goes wrong I was always blamed for all the things I never did and always being critised and looked down on. I was called lazy, ugly, fatty, blacky, what else was there? I don't know. Half of the things I don't remember anymore. Ya. SURE. I don't know how to do half of the housework. Like as if I'm THE ONLY ONE in the world who does not know how to do ANY housework. Anyway when I was little I'm always being chased out of the kitchen whenever I want to help.
Which one would you rather me tell?
I wanted to tell all this but then I was thinking "What is the bloody point?"
Is that question from the bottom of a caring and concerned heart who really wants to know OR Is that question asked because somebody reported their findings of my blog and it felt as though ego is ripped away?
Is anything ever going to change? NAH...
Am I going to get permission to go overseas to places I've always wanted to go to? NAH...
Am I miraculously going to get to stay overnight with my friends at chalets? NAH...
So what is the bloody point in asking?
I'm 27, and I am still caged and not given any freedom. Like who ever can stand living in a life like this? No freedom, No love, No happiness. I'm 27 but being treated like 17. Or wait. 17 year olds get freedom nowadays. Maybe 7. I'm 27 yet being treated like 7. Living at home is just giving me the jitters. Everything I do is wrong. Everything I do is being Surviellanced. MY Wallet. MY Bag. MY Passport. MY BankBook. Even MY HANDPHONE. It's worst them living in a gaol.
So, to the person who reported my blog post, CONGRATULATIONS! You have just made my life worst than it already is. Don't you know that "Silence is Golden?" Yup, agree, ^^ said that I should say it out instead of keeping all pent up inside. BUT do you know what happens when I say it out? Listening is not their forte. They are too egoistic to actually put their guard down and give in a little. BUT it does not matter. This family is not mine. I could have just walked away but I didn't because I think of their honour and pride. Furthermore, Tongues will Wag. Especially Tongues like YourS.
